Loss and grief
There can be different reasons why people feel sad, confused or unhappy.
- A person you love dies
- One of your parents moves out
- You lose a pet
- You have to move house and/or school
- You move away from your friends and cannot see them any more
When your parents separate it's only natural to feel sad. Often it's Dad who moves out when parents separate but sometimes it's Mum who leaves. Maybe you feel that you have also lost the parent you still live with because they might have to go to work more or they are upset a lot and can't be there for you.
When families separate there can be different kinds of losses, especially when children have to move. Losses can include:
- Having one of your parents living with you instead of two
- Your pets
- Some of your friends
- Contact with some family members
- Your house
- Your neighbourhood
- Your school
- Your financial security
- Your emotional security
- Your sense of family
Everyone is different; therefore everyone has their own way of showing their sad feelings. Reactions to a loss can be very different. Maybe you feel some of the following things.
- ANGER - "Why did you do that to me..."
- DENIAL, SHOCK or DISBELIEF - "This isn't really true, they will change their mind ..."
- ANXIETY - "What is going to happen to me now ..."
- DEPRESSION, SADNESS - "I want to cry all the time ...". "Life is miserable..."
- PHYSICAL SYMPTOMS - headaches, sleeping and eating problems
- RELIEF - "The worst is over..."
There are no right or wrong feelings when a separation happens to you. Feelings can come and go and often change in one day. Don't ignore them. Talk to someone about your feelings or write them down.
People find different ways to deal with losses. There are many things you can do that will help you to feel better.
